Bookish Musings & Discussion Time // My (Blogging) Struggles, and Disappointments

Happy Saturday, everyone! 🍂

It’s been a while since my last discussion post, and I’ve really come to love them, because they always result in so many amazing conversations with you all.

I have to confess that I’m extremely nervous about this one, though, because I share a lot of my fears and worries with you, so … please be kind.

💭

Something I pride myself on is always being completely honest with you, and always speaking out on things I believe in—and while that has certainly been true, and will always be true, there are also things that I haven’t talked about all that much, or even mentioned.

Mostly, because I’m a very private person, and it takes a lot of time until I really open up. But also, simply because I primarily—with exceptions, of course—talk about bookish things on all my social media platforms.

Private GIF - Sprinkles of DreamsI 100% lack Michelle Trachtenberg’s sass, though, I mostly just … hide in the confines of my introvert-bubble.

I think those of you who chat with me outside of blogging, can oftentimes read between the lines, and also know that in-between my little (blogging) successes and achievements that I share with you, and my never-ending love and enthusiasm when it comes to blogging, my (blogging) life isn’t solely made up of rainbow and butterflies.

💭

The beginning of October was pretty exciting for me; I talked about ARCs and blog tours I was approved and picked for, as well as other events in my life that made me really happy. I received so many wonderful emails and news, and I couldn’t be more thankful about them, as well as feel incredibly lucky.

But to be completely honest with you, they are the rays of sunlight that just barely permeated a darker, murkier, and cloudier sky right beneath, leaving glimpses into what could be, if only (I didn’t still struggle with my mental health so much [and didn’t live internationally?]).

Because while I work very hard on my blog—yes, I invest a lot of my heart, and a considerable amount of my time, and sometimes, I’ve even neglected my mental health (120% do not recommend!!), to make my blog into what it is today—and as amazing as it might seem that I and my blog are doing (I’ve received a lot of messages about my “blogging success”, ever since my blog post on ARCs) … it’s definitely not the whole picture.

And to be honest, I don’t really feel all that successful.

💭

While things looked absolutely “amazing” from the outside, I’ve never told you about all the times things didn’t work out for me. Which, in hindsight, I probably should have, because I want to let you know that blogging isn’t a linear experience, especially when it comes to things like ARCs, and other opportunities you get through blogging.

I’ve been rejected for so many eARCs from both NetGalley and Edelweiss, sometimes even right away, or didn’t even hear back from them at all—but that’s not what I mainly want to talk about. Because sometimes, the reason behind that could simply be that my blog is barely half a year old (which is actually the sole reason I was rejected for one particular book, as stated by a publisher in an email).

What I want to talk about is that “blogging success” is relative.

💭

Because no matter what I’ve “achieved” so far in the eyes of one person, it could be barely anything in the eyes of another person (me); there’s always that nagging feeling in the back of my head that I should, and could be doing more.

Since my classes started this semester, I haven’t had the time to visit so many blogs that I love, or leave comments; I haven’t written as many blog posts as I wanted to write (about topics I’m very passionate about), and—ever since I started requesting books from publishers directly—I’ve been stressing out about my stats a lot.

Thinking, “am I doing enough?”, “why did this post only get x comments, when I used to get x²?”, “do publishers think 4000 views in a month is a lot, or nothing at all??”, “my blog isn’t growing as fast anymore, does that mean I’m not writing as amazing blog posts anymore?”, “should I make a bigger effort to grow my blog/Twitter*/Instagram?”.

Stressed GIF Seinfeld - Sprinkles of Dreams

*I only just joined Twitter about a month ago, and I’ve noticed that oftentimes publishers want you to have a certain amount of followers there to even consider you, and … it makes me so sad that I’m excluded from some opportunities from the get-go—which is in no way any kind of criticism, because obviously, publishers want their books to go to people who have a wide reach! I totally understand. Still, it stings.

Just … in general, feeling “less than”. And I don’t know if I’m alone in this, but if some of you sometimes feel this way, I do want to say this:

You might get “rejected” a lot of times [by publishers, blog tour organizers, &c.], and then one day, the stars line up, and you get exactly what you wish for. Or … maybe you don’t. But if you truly love blogging, please keep at it. Because it’s such a wonderful and rewarding experience, no matter how many other opportunities present themselves to you as a result.

💭

I guess I just have to remind myself of that; of how I started blogging without even knowing about physical ARCs, or anything like that, but simply because I wanted to connect with others, and share my love of books.

Because I’m so happy I did, seeing as without blogging, I wouldn’t have made all these amazing friends, I wouldn’t have had so many great conversations, been able to talk about issues I’m not bold enough (yet?) to talk about in real life. And I wouldn’t have had the opportunity to voice my thoughts at all, not like this.

Not about depression, and how it has shaped my life in ways I still can’t quite articulate.

Moreover, I just want to thank each and every one of you who’s following me, who’s reading my posts, and interacting with me, and who is sending me the sweetest and most encouraging messages when I’m feeling down, because it really means so much to me.

Thank you, from the bottom of my heart.

Sprinkles of Dreams - Let's Chat

What are your experiences with (book) blogging?

What are some things that keep you passionate about blogging, always?

Do you struggle with feeling like you should be doing more?

I’d love to hear about your blogging journey! 💗

xx, lily - Sprinkles of Dreams
Bloglovin’ – Goodreads – Instagram – Tumblr – Twitter

123 thoughts on “Bookish Musings & Discussion Time // My (Blogging) Struggles, and Disappointments”

  1. Oops, accidentally pressed send too early.

    I wanted to add that, in the end, you need to make sure that blogging makes you happy. It’s not a job, for most of us, and I understand the need to make it perfect at the cost of hours of sleep, anxiety and delaying chores and other things. But remember that it’s okay if you miss posting for a while. It’s okay if you put less effort into it. Having a few posts coming up every once in a while that you actually want to post is much better than having regular posts that you feel obligated to post for sake of consistency.

    You’re doing fine ❤

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you SO much for your sweet message, Naty! It really means the world to me—I know I’m going to be reminding myself of this a lot, and hearing it from someone else really helped. Thank you ❤❤

      I hope you have an absolutely wonderful day!! xx

      Like

  2. Thanks so much for your honesty, I am sure this will resonate with many people. Lately my views and comments and general stats have also either stagnated or gone down, but honestly I cannot bring myself to care too much… it’s just a hobby after all. I am sorry to hear that it bothers you so, and I want to make it clear that your feelings are valid and that there certainly is some pressure from the publishers to have your numbers up, which is quite sad.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Aw, it’s really something I needed to get off my chest, and I’m glad if I could help even one person feel less alone. I’m glad you’re not worrying too much about it, and thank you so much for your kind words! 💗

      I know it’s something I have to work on myself, since I didn’t use to even look much at my stats, let alone worry about them, but knowing that publishers will be judging me by them (which, of course, because it doesn’t make sense for them to “invest” in someone who doesn’t have a wide reach) is making me pressure myself, which is … not good. 😌

      Like

  3. Lily this post is SO relatable! Like you, I am so grateful for the opportunities I get from blogging, but I’ve also experienced some of the negative feelings that you have. It hurts a little when I put so much effort into my posts but it doesn’t get many views, or publishers reject my requests. I’ve been blogging for a while, but I still feel like my blog is relatively small when compared to other blogs. Sometimes blogging feels a little pointless, or like it drains up so much of my time without many rewards. Ultimately, I really love blogging, but I have absolutely had those moments where I’m like, “Why am I doing this again?” But then there are also those moments when someone tells me that they started bullet journaling because of me, or they picked up a book and loved it because I recommended it. That’s when I think, “Oh yeah, this is part of what makes blogging worthwhile.” Also I just love writing about books! But sometimes it’s hard to remember that that’s why I’m doing this. Anyway, sorry for basically just writing a very long, very disorganized essay, but I wanted to let you know that I 100% know what you’re talking about in this post, and I really appreciate you publishing it ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Annie, you’re absolutely wonderful, and I cherish your friendship so much! 💛 Your messages always mean a lot to me, and I hope you know that! 🌻

      And ahh please don’t apologize for this comment!! I’m always here if you need to vent, or express your thoughts. Honestly, I’m so thankful you did, because reading this made me realize that I’m not alone with my struggles, and shouldn’t feel bad for sometimes feeling like blogging “doesn’t pay off”, as bad as that sounds.

      Your blog is so lovely, and you made me fall in love with bullet journalling again (even though I’m too busy to do it myself atm), and I always love seeing your posts here and on Instagram, even if I don’t always comment.

      Sending you hugs & love! 💛💛💫

      Liked by 1 person

  4. I totally understand what you’re saying, Lily! I’ve definitely noticed a change since school started, which I expected and all, but it’s still hard. I put in so much time scheduling posts that I was happy with and interested in, and they still didn’t do as great as I wanted them to. Like, they’ve all done fine and I can’t really complain, but I also know they would’ve done better if I had more time to interact with other people, which I haven’t been able to as much. And I feel like I’m missing out on so many good posts, which is so sad. But it’s also important to remember that your mental health and school and real life are just as important as your blog ❤

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Ahh Ally, I’m so glad you understand (though, of course, I hate the fact that you relate 😞). ❤

      And you put it into words perfectly—it's the fact that I really can't complain, but still know that I could “do better”, if I put in more effort, but where do we draw the line? Because there are only so many hours in one day, and it shouldn’t all be about blogging, even if we love it, right?

      (Also, your blog is also one that I’ve been missing so much, and I feel so bad for neglecting to read. 😭)

      Thank you so much for your sweet message, I hope everything’s going well for you! ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  5. This is so relatable and true!!
    But really Lily, you are doing an amazing job and screw all the stats (although we started together and you’re much more successful and I am happy for you and happy about my blog too).
    And here is a confession: your posts are always the most anticipated for me! I sometimes not in the mood to blog hop and read posts or I just have too much to study. But your posts are always an exclusion and I red them right away no more what (As evidenced by me writing this comment at midnight and I have to wake up after 5 hours to go 2 hours by bus for the hospital).
    Short story: you rock! and just keep blessing us with wonderful posts no matter what stats say!
    And I am out 😛

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Hamad!! This honestly means the world to me, I appreciate you so much. 😭💙 I’m so, so happy that my posts are that special to you, and I hope you’re not suffering the consequences of staying up late to read and comment on this one ahh. 🙈

      I can’t tell you how happy it makes me to hear that you said you’re happy with your blog, because in the end, no stats or anything else can accomplish that, if you don’t feel about it this way yourself.

      Sending you lots of energy for today & I hope the rest of your weekend is absolutely fantastic! Thank you a million times for this wonderful comment, I’m so incredibly lucky to know you. 💙💙

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Aww, I am glad it does! I think there were not many consequences and I made it through another day!

        I wasn’t happy at first before picking up this theme and having a style in mind but after that, I am pretty proud of what I have now 😀

        Thanks ❤
        You're welcome and I can say the same 💙💙

        Liked by 1 person

Leave a Note 💌

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s